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Taste Tester Wanted

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  • Taste Tester Wanted

    As I've stated before I have way to much time on my hands . , enjoy

    Taste Tester Wanted ( c ) Glen MItton 2021

    Taste Tester wanted , send in your resume
    If you don't have any experience that's okay
    Taste tester wanted , you read that right
    I need someone willing to take that first bite
    If you were in my shoes you'd do the same
    I have new respect for the words , fair game

    People around here are really being rude
    I'm being referred to as that old white dude
    I need to show them that I'm as sharp as a tack
    It would be " kudos " if you looked like me exact
    The right age , the right height weight and width
    Oh ya , I almost forgot you should be good with kids

    You get to put one of those " thingy's " in your ear
    Mine doesn't work so well , nothing comes in clear
    I do hear all the whispering going on behind my back
    Watch as I turn around fast and they freeze in their tracks
    And this woman hanging around , gives me the evil eye
    Every time I ask her for some coffee , I don't know why

    Talk about suspicious and not being wanted
    Besides that I think this whole place is haunted
    I keep hearing weird sounds , weird moans and groans
    And it's not my belly , I sure do miss home
    Everything's different , the kitchen the lights
    I keep bumping my shins and cursing the night

    They say there's a secret door behind one of these panels
    That's where you step in , you watch the door , I'll try to dismantle
    I heard one of these guys before me rented out the Lincoln room
    But with all this virus crap , maybe I could do it by " Virtual Zoom "
    So I'm putting out bids to what's left of our history majors
    But everyone knows which room is the real moneymaker

    In the cool evenings , I like to go for a walk
    You know , to get away from the squawk
    Let me just say , sometimes it is a barrage
    On days like that , you'll find me behind the garage
    They made fun of my predecessor for not having pets
    But the city is coming down hard , something's I do regret

    They think they have me pinned , but I sneaked out last night
    I went for walk and looked at the all pretty lights
    A person came up to me and put a dollar bill in my hand
    I went to ask question , they shooed me away , I said " well I be damned "
    April Fools Day is coming I'm not taking anything for granted
    I tell you folks , working around here leaves a guy disenchanted

    You will be paid , the new minimum wage
    As long as you are willing to handle the rage
    I'm taking a chance putting this ad in the paper
    So I'm using a pseudonym it makes me feel safer
    The glass ceiling is cracked and the frame has come loose
    That's why I need someone here to watch my caboose

    Java 46