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Purse Pursuit

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  • Purse Pursuit

    Purse Pursuit ( c ) Glen Mitton 2019

    There really is nothing worse
    Than your wife or gal losing her purse
    In that split second panic sets in
    Throwing both of you into a tailspin
    A guy's wallet just holds the essentials
    Money , credit cards and credentials
    A women's purse holds everything dear
    My wife's purse holds pair of shears !
    Monty Hall would of been impressed
    Who knows ? , you might have to alter a dress !

    Like a Girl Scout she's always prepared
    I took a peek inside , it looked like a night mare !
    The rest of your day goes out the window
    Your mind races , she clutches a pillow
    I'm thinking " It has to be someplace "
    " It's the size of a small carry-on suitcase "
    " Will the finder be a " Good Samaritan " ?
    " Or be ordering room service at the Sheraton "
    In this day and age " Identity Theft " matters
    You don't want to serve it on a silver platter

    The first thing you do is retrace your steps
    I drove her back , she shed tears of regret
    As the window of opportunity got thinner
    I'm thinking , " I should of made her pay for dinner" !
    I tried to give her some kind of solace
    Telling her , " don't worry it's probably in an office "
    But this isn't a pair of " readers " or sun glasses
    This loss may have some monetary circumstances
    This was no time to argue , I let her call the shots
    After all , it was her stomach tied in knots

    My ex left hers on the top of a car
    She made it home but it didn't get far
    Luckily a woman spotted it on her way
    She definitely was the hero that day
    Now don't get me wrong I lose stuff too
    When it was my wallet I was feeling blue
    I lost mine when I was moving a log off the road
    I found it the next day squished like a flatten toad
    But a phone call would of taken care of the credit cards
    It's standing in line at the DMV that's unbearably hard !

    As luck would have it , someone DID turn it in
    Much to my lack of faith chagrin
    She took a quick glance and felt the weight
    She smiled and said " it's okay "
    I said , " okay ? , is the checkbook there ? , what about the money " ?
    Getting out some gum she said , " it's all there don't worry honey "
    I said , " I'm buying you a purse with a chain on it , plus a lottery ticket " !
    She pulled out those shears and said " I love you too , don't make me snippet "
    With a sigh I said " It does give you comfort when honesty prevails "
    She then said gleefully " Oh ! , now you can take me to do my nails " !

  • #2
    It got a little too hokey for me on that last line (even if it's actually the way it played out) but I can definitely relate to the sense of panic involved in this situation...as I misplaced my house keys just a couple of days ago. Found safely - thank goodness - but while we were looking....yep, you nailed that feeling.

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    • #3
      it was funny to see all that panic go out the window when we did find it. I thought I'd write about , just having fun ,thanks for the comment

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