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  • Impact!

    IMPACT!

    From a depth deep chilled by the darkness
    came a dread rock hurtling thru the night.
    It was seven miles wide and Everest high
    and it wobbled with a turn to the right.

    Then it twisted like a hula skirt, tumbling thru the universe,
    speeding meteoric like the comets only dare,
    racing thru the cosmos, mega-tons coming close.
    Life on the Earth unattentive, unaware.

    Its weight shifted massive with a movement
    from the pull of our gravitating Sun
    that pulsed a convulsion which added more propulsion
    to this asteroid ablaze and on the run.


    Then it smashed winds of Neptune, crushed rings of Saturn too,
    bounced off of Jupiter to clear the face of Mars,
    pierced thru its red dust, Moon looming up just.
    People on the Earth eating, loving, driving cars.

    I saw it flash my window ‘cross the night’s sky,
    blazing closer, burning larger like my fear
    and I knew Man was braking to a standstill
    ‘cause the clicking of the seconds I could hear.

    Then it ticked close of Mankind blasting off the face of Time,
    tumbling with his wonders thru a Space of endless black
    where Fate will claim his special brand of fashioned life by cosmic hand,
    that made the dust that made the man, at eternity’s brink of impact.


    Namyh

    Last edited by Namyh; 06-29-2019, 05:38 AM.

  • #2
    I liked your lightness much here, that was some beginning! Nice wordplay and rhythms maintained... I only just now after re-reading a few times, realize, that you used a formal rhyme scheme. Thanks for sharing, this brought me to some keen, fond places

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    • #3
      I just witnessed an astral pinball game 😵
      10,000 likes you win Namyh!!!!

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      • #4
        A very fun piece! I especially liked the first stanza! Very nicely done! Namyh

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        • #5
          AmenOra - When cooking this, I mixed 2 ounces of engaged "wordplay" with ½ pint of “rhyme & rhythm” sprinkled with 1 tablespoon of “fright filled phrasing”, then baked for 30 minutes for that "deep-dish" level of appreciation. It's the "End-of-the-World" takeout order, our specialty. So very happy you stopped in for a poetic bite here at the Rhymezone restaurant where there’s always something cookin’ in the oven. We never close, even when the world is ending ! LOL. Thanks for enjoying this AO. Namyh
          Last edited by Namyh; 06-13-2019, 09:55 AM.

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          • #6
            Not sure I'd WANT to see this coming...fantastical end-times power play Namyh !

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            • #7
              So very glad you grabbed a front row seat for this astral pinball grand finale of inter-planetary collisions(Bobby Del Boy) where Klingon coffee is served as suns collapse, comets explode and meteors crumble to dust. And from the first stanza on(Rhymeboy), you may not want to see what's coming(Rhyme Loving Writer) but your eyes are glued to the brightness, and you get that strange feeling in your gut that maybe it's the end of times. Whoa! Thanks fellow scribblers for stopping in for the light show!! This is Captain Namyh of the Starship Rhymezone signing off.
              Last edited by Namyh; 06-28-2019, 06:47 PM.

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              • #8
                I enjoyed this it has a nice balance when you read it. Did you mean Hula not Hulu?

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                • #9
                  Parkinsonspoet - Thanks loads for enjoying this work and also its balance. I very much appreciated your detective recognition of that "hula" which I missed countless of times. Now there's an IMPACT for ya!! Namyh
                  Last edited by Namyh; 06-29-2019, 05:41 AM.

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                  • #10
                    I enjoyed this Namyh. It was quite a ride.

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                    • #11
                      Alexandra - The extinction of very early prehistoric life opened the door for the dinosaurs. When they died out, the door opened for us, the mammals. Who knows how long our door will stay open. Perhaps just knowing that Death strikes each day is inspiration enough to live your life as though you were immortal even up ‘til the moment a meteor hits or the sun dies and all goes dark in 8 minutes and Porky Pig on the tube can be heard to say the final “Dat, Dat, Dat, Dat’s all folks”. So very glad you came along on this cosmic rocket ride to the edge. All aboard! Namyh

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                      • #12
                        JazzyG - Thanks for liking this and I can feel your 'impact'. Namyh

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                        • #13
                          I definitely enjoyed every bit of it and I have you bookmarked your blog to check out the new stuff you post in the future. click here

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                          • #14
                            JoshuaP - No poet of words stands more proud than when a created work has "every bit of it" enjoyed by a kindred poet. Kinda makes the day better. Thanks JP. Namyh

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