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How I Met The Queen

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  • How I Met The Queen

    LMAO! This is a funny story about a fictitious Queen of England! I hope you all enjoy!


    I traveled ----- all the way to England
    to catch a glimpse ----- of the Queen
    But she stayed locked ------ in her palace
    so she would not ----- be seen

    Now ---- I thought that
    was very selfish ------ and mean
    It's not ------ like I was asking
    to have tea ------ with the Queen

    All ------ I really wanted
    was to brag ------ and say
    That I saw ----- the Queen
    outside her palace ------ one day

    I was ----- really hoping
    that I would get ------ a good look
    And perhaps ------ take a photo
    to put in ------ my scrapbook

    But I guess ------ that won't happen
    At least ---- not today
    And I've traveled ------ so far
    I've come such ------ a long way

    Staying locked ------ in her palace
    was not ------ very nice
    And I was hoping ------ to see the Queen
    at least ------ once or twice

    After all ----- I had traveled
    a very ------ long way
    And I was hoping ------ to see the Queen
    in her carriage ------ one day

    The Queen ------ was so wrong!
    It just ----- was not right!
    And I thought ------ of the Queen
    as I slept ------ through the night

    I tossed ---- and I turned
    as I slept ----- in my bed
    Suddenly ---- a brilliant idea
    popped into my head

    My brilliant idea
    means I must cause ---- a huge scene
    The likes of which ----- no one
    in England ----- has seen!

    My plan ---- is quite odd
    And somewhat twisted ------ and mean
    But my plan ----- would guarantee me
    A glimpse ----- of the Queen!

    It was a brilliant idea
    But ----- I would have to work fast
    Because a day of vacation
    had already passed

    Now, I could only stay ----- in England
    a little more ----- than a week
    And I was determined ----- to see the Queen
    even if it was just ----- a small peek

    Now ---- when you really want something,
    You just cannot ------ be shy
    And you can't ------ let opportunities
    like this ----- pass you by

    Now ---- lying is bad
    And ----- it can get you in trouble
    And when ----- you get punished
    your pain ----- will be double

    But ---- my clever idea
    was still ----- worth a try
    Even though ----- it would mean
    I would have to tell ----- a big lie

    So ----- I started a rumor
    And said the Queen ----- had dropped dead
    And ------ I was rather amazed
    at how quickly ----- it spread

    The lie spread ----- through the cities
    It spread ----- through the towns
    Even children -------were spreading it
    on all ------ the playgrounds

    People asked ------ all sorts of questions
    about the Queen's ----- sudden death
    They wanted to know ----- where she was
    when she took ------ her last breath

    People asked ----- "Was the Queen all alone
    when she was fatally stricken?"
    I said, -----"She choked on a bone
    while eating fried chicken."

    I said ----- "Yes, it's sad ---- but it's true
    And it's a shame too.
    When I heard the sad news
    I didn't know what to do!

    The Queen was eating ------ fried chicken
    Because she's not allowed ----- to eat pork!'
    So she had ---- KFC
    flown in ----- from New York."

    I couldn't hold -----back my laughter
    so I went off ------ to the side
    I didn't want ------ to be seen laughing
    so I found someplace ----- to hide

    I laughed so hard
    my body ached ----- on one side
    I just could not believe
    just how much ----- I had lied.

    Well ---- people actually believed
    that the old ------ Queen had died
    So, they gathered ----- outside her palace
    and just stood there ------ and cried

    The people cried ----- and they cried
    They were weeping ----- so loud
    When a servant peeked ------out a window
    He saw ------ the large crowd

    There were thousands ----- of people
    Both the Young ------ and the Old
    They must have really ----- loved the Queen
    because it was really ----- quite cold

    Now, the Queen ----didn't know anything
    until the servant ----- had said,
    "Your Majesty! ----- The People!
    They think ----- you are dead!"

    The moment ----- the Queen heard
    what the servant ---- had said
    She threw ---- off the covers
    And jumped straight ----- out of bed

    She quickly ---- put on her robes
    and put her crown ----- on her head
    She stuck ----- her head out a window
    and yelled ----- "I'm not dead! I'm not dead!"

    The Queen ----- continued to yell,
    "I'm not dead! ---- I'm not dead!"
    Until all ---- the people saw her
    with her crown ----- on her head.

    When the people saw her ----- they were happy.
    What a joyous ---- surprise!
    They all jumped for joy
    and wiped tears ----- from their eyes

    The people cheered ----- "Long live the Queen!"
    And they all wished her ----- their best
    Then they all ----- went back home
    for some ----- much needed rest

    The Queen ---- was quite touched
    by the people's ----- show of devotion
    Heavy tears ----- filled her eyes
    She was overcome ----- with emotion

    The Queen ----- waved goodbye
    as she watched ---- the last people go
    Then she noticed ------ me standing
    beneath ---- her window

    The Queen ------ seemed like a person
    with a good ------ sense of humor
    So, I told her ------ it was me
    who had started ------ the rumor

    I said ----"I'm sorry I lied
    And said ------ you were dead.
    But, I just said ------ all those things
    so you would stick ------ out your head!

    I thought ---- if I make you stick out your head
    then your face ------ would be seen
    And when I ------ go back home
    I could say ------- 'I saw the Queen!'

    You see I ------ come from New York.
    And I've been ------ here all week
    And I was determined ------ to see you
    Even, if it was just ------ a small peek!"

    The Queen laughed ---- and she laughed
    She wasn't angry ------ with me
    She even invited me ------ into the palace
    so I could ------ join her for tea

    The palace doors ------ suddenly swung open
    And the guards ------ blew on their trumpets
    The Queen ------ poured the tea
    And, of course ---- we had crumpets

    We talked ------ and we talked
    And she said ------ she had never
    Met a boy ------ quite like me
    one so remarkably ------ clever

    Again ----- I apologized to the Queen
    Spreading that rumor ------ was wrong
    I only wanted ------ to see the Queen
    I had waited ------ so long

    The Queen said, ----- "Sometimes, if you want to open a gate
    the gate must sometimes ------ be shoved
    But at least ----- I found out
    just how much ------ I was loved."

    Well! ---- At least, I got to see the Queen!
    And it was much more ------ than a peek!
    The Queen ------ liked me so much,
    she let me stay ------ a whole week!

    I roamed ------ through the gardens!
    And I ran ------ through the palace!
    And now ------ I finally know
    what it's like to drink ---- from a chalice!

    Finally ------ it was time
    for me to say ------ my Good-bye
    And the Queen ------ looked so sad
    that I thought ------ she would cry

    Well ----- I went back to New York
    with pictures of all ------that I'd seen
    And I told the everyone ------ the story
    of how I ------ met the Queen

  • #2
    I enjoyed your story.


    • Rhymeboy
      Rhymeboy commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for taking the time to comment AtL! Much appreciated! I know how you tend to avoid long pieces! Lol!

  • #3
    It seems every time I read something you write I get lovely pictures in my head. I can't draw, but this begs for illustration. Do you ever illustrate your poetry?


    • Rhymeboy
      Rhymeboy commented
      Editing a comment
      I can't draw either! Lol! . . . but at one time I was looking for an illustrator! I wrote this one several years ago and never posted it because I wanted to publish it as a book. But no illustrator materialized so I just posted it here. Thanks for commenting!

  • #4
    God saved the Queen. 🤪👸


    • Rhymeboy
      Rhymeboy commented
      Editing a comment
      LMAO! Lol! Thanks for reading and commenting Bobby Del Boy

  • #5
    This gave me a huge smile and it is actually quite timely as I am invited to a Royal Garden party next month


    • Rhymeboy
      Rhymeboy commented
      Editing a comment
      Wow! A Royal Garden Party! Congratulations! Save some crumpets for me! Lol! Thanks for reading and commenting Parkinsonspoet!

    • Parkinsonspoet
      Parkinsonspoet commented
      Editing a comment
      I hope I will be able to provide a poetic crumpet afterwards

    • Rhymeboy
      Rhymeboy commented
      Editing a comment
      We will all be waiting! Lol!