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When you’re a kid

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  • When you’re a kid

    WHEN YOU’RE A KID

    When I was a kid
    We used to play a game
    It was called murder by some
    Others called it dodge ball
    I was really good and my team usually won
    But I never played against the MAFIA
    Or CANCER
    So now that I’m older and a looser to both
    That game that I played as kid
    Is no longer fun

    RDS
    THE SECOND

  • #2
    how we look back and have different views. this is life.

    Comment


    • amenOra
      amenOra commented
      Editing a comment
      what would it be like if we looked back and had the same views?
      *ike*

  • #3
    Those last lines ...

    I notice they sort of mirror, backwards, the first two lines too. I used to hang out with Italians, one had ties to the mafia, well I suppose most of them did. My mom was diagnosed with cancer and had it removed. I feel for you, the Second.
    This sets up a sort of relationship: Dodge ball and murder, it makes me think. Simple logic is alluring, and if done right can be so affective.
    And I notice the 'flow' is really well done too.
    Loser as an adjective, indeed, only has one O.

    This is simple, a bit chilling, its brevity and conciseness and 'no frills' make it raw, and I know everyone could relate to this in some way
    Thanks for sharing.

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