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Bleak and Bliss

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  • Bleak and Bliss

    Bleak and Bliss

    On the slope of a hilltop, a steep mountain did drop
    down to the rapids of a river named Syn.
    Panic in the rain’s roar plunged on its slanted floor.
    Bleak, on a horse of bones, galloped down the wind.

    Behind, Greed and Envy rode their palomino steeds
    with Wrath next to Lust and Chaos in the night.
    To a town called Choice raced Bleak and his marauders
    ‘cross a moon where horses shine skinless in the light.

    Daylight would be coming soon, sizzling hot the sand dunes.
    Faith, Hope and Charity waited dawn’s light to kiss.
    Their horses neighed a cry! Love and Justice looked to sky.
    Through the rays of the Sun like a fist galloped Bliss
    .

    On streaks of sultry sizzling sand, his horse Sunlight burned red.
    Bliss waved a hand and beckoned with a blast of booming voice.
    Off the sand dune they did heed, self-propelled by hooves of speed
    to catch Sunlight’s blistered blaze now inbound and aimed for Choice.

    And flickering ‘cross horizon stars
    betwixt the moonlight’s beams and bars,
    Bleak and Bliss rode prairies ‘til they reached a half-mile gap.
    Seeing Choice ahead, they tightened reins
    to jump that impasse half-mile gain,
    and fearless leaped the chasm, hooves in air landing pat.

    Our human halves of Bleak and Bliss
    are flaws and strengths we would commit
    to reach a Choice that we need make
    requires always…..some Leap of Faith
    .

    Namyh


  • #2
    Will be gone for a while. Thanks for your comments. Namyh

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    • #3
      Sorry to hear you'll be gone for awhile. Hope all is well with you. You've gone out in a blaze of action with this one Namyh . Look forward to your return!

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      • #4
        RLW - Glad to be back and all is well. And I'm so happy you were just in time for this blaze of action creation. Namyh

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        • #5
          Vibrant energy, and I've read it a few times, even outloud, my favorite part was the "shining skinless" bit, which was such a striking image to me, startling really. Wow. Some places the rhythm "lost" me, which I'm unsure why... such as "and fearless leaped the chasm, hooves in air landing pat." The last bit of the phrase is jarring to me, doesn't fit to my ear. It's curious, cuz I have been wondering how much of my "own" inflection is transferred to another, where perhaps it does meld for "me" but might not be heard the same way.
          A klunky way of saying that I enjoyed the poem more for the rich content, story, and texture, than the others of yours which "flew" more musically and beautifully-- the "sound".
          The naming the horses was effective, "his horse Sunlight burned red" is another favorite line, so powerful.
          Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading.
          Kudos & peace!
          Last edited by amenOra; 02-06-2019, 03:37 AM.

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