No announcement yet.


  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Rhymeboy
    commented on 's reply
    Thank You amenOra I really appreciate you kind words and detailed commentary

  • amenOra
    Good job, Rhymeboy, I came in hopeful to see/read some good poetry, and you did well ... this one, with an edge. I thought the rhythm was tight, and the formatting sort of made it sing, jingle? not sure how to say it. You have a knack for that, as well as for (lately) the startling, surprising, using 'pathos' to good effect.
    "Death leans over the child's crib ---- and to himself he thinks:" --- lines like this just really sing to me!
    Deep thought with the grit of Death metaphied and personified! Enjoyed the read.

    Leave a comment:

  • Rhymeboy
    started a topic Death


    This is an old one . . . but very philosophical I think.


    Even at our birth
    Death lurks nearby
    He watches each newborn
    baby cry

    Death waits so patiently
    to destroy
    every newborn baby
    girl and boy

    Now, with each moment of life ------ the life force shrinks
    Death leans over the child's crib ---- and to himself he thinks:
    Do I let this child ------ have a really long life?
    Do I let it have a husband ------- or a wife?

    Or do I shorten ------- its time on Earth
    and kill it shortly ------- after birth?
    Do I kill them ----- on a plane?
    Or do I kill them ------ on a train?

    But one of his favorite ------ ways by far
    Is to kill his victim -------- with a car
    But then there's method ------ number one
    when he kills his victim ------- with a gun

    With so many options ------ Death must be torn
    because so many babies --------are not even born
    They die within ------ their mother's womb
    and she becomes ------ their Earthly tomb

    Since Death is present ------- at our birth
    he knows what each ----- new life is worth
    He knows the reasons ------- for our birth
    So, he calculates ------- our time on Earth

    But usually, Death ------ just stands aside
    And let's us go on ------- Life's wild ride
    While he thinks ----- on matters like:
    the How, the When ------ and Where he'll strike!