Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

She Danced

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • She Danced

    She Danced

    Out from the mystic shadow, she stepped into the night
    clothed in something shimmering that flowed with glistened light.
    It stopped my breath and skipped my heart to lock my brain in place
    as she walked across the dancing floor with poise of regal grace.

    Houselights dimmed. Voices muted. The audience held its breath
    Which seemed as one eternal gasp prolonged and pulled and stretched.
    I heard the finger cymbals clash and break the air with sound.
    The music played. She moved a foot. A tremor pulsed the ground.

    The rhythm grabbed me, fold and wrapped me in its sultry beat,
    igniting blood to reckless boil while riveted to my seat.
    I tried to move. I tried to blink. My eyes were locked to stay
    ‘cause on her belly button, there a jewel did rhythmic sway.

    Hypnotic twinkling glints of light did mesmerize my core.
    Her toes, bejeweled with gems of flash, danced upon the floor
    and when she twirled and came to stop our eyes electric met.
    The jewel dislodged. It leaped from her and landed on my chest.

    Stunned, I was! My legs rose up. She watched from where she stood
    as the jewel began to float my feet across the floor of wood.
    She grabbed my waist. She touched my hand and I was hers at last.
    I didn’t hear the audience clap. I only heard my gasp.

    Magic, witchcraft, tricks of sorcery! Who cares what was in play!
    She made me beam. I fell in love and married her anyway.
    And on the nights we kiss the light which pulls us both entranced,
    we glance the jewel and laugh and sing and dance! dance! dance!

    Namyh

  • #2
    It's veeery beautiful. I imagined a trible dancer...
    But i think, in the last (6th ) part of the poem the rhythm of the poem changed a bit.

    Comment


    • Namyh
      Namyh commented
      Editing a comment
      Que Linda - It’s amazing how a #2 yellow pencil can visually be a historical totem pole to your poetic tensions, frustrations and tears of trying to create something, especially with incisor and molar indentations in its wood that would make a canine drool and a lumberjack cry, as in this case. LOL. I hope this delivered a poetic dance for those more tribal moments and thanks for stopping in QueLinda to enjoy, even if the 6th changed a bit. Namyh
      Last edited by Namyh; 08-19-2018, 08:06 AM.

  • #3
    I found the story and pacing of this very good. You moved the story forward with every stanza and wrapped it up nicely as well. Bravo.

    Comment


    • Namyh
      Namyh commented
      Editing a comment
      Biocide - I wanted to write a feel-good story and this popped up after watching reruns of “Dancing with the Stars”. Don’t ask! Don’t ask! LOL. I’m always amazed at the people, places or events which fire the imagination and like this help bring an unexpected jewel fusing two people to an unexpected blending. Thanks Biocide for having a little fun and staying here for the "wrap up". Namyh
Working...
X