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Senryu attempts...

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  • Senryu attempts...

    Collected these from posting them on a Group on Fbook.
    These I think display what 'senryu' is.

    a battle of wits -
    not quite enough
    anymore

    -

    curiously spiders are like the shapes of their webs

    (1 lined senryu I've seen lately too...)

    -

    sad songs
    too many of them
    alone

    -

    his last words
    "may God strike
    me dead."

    -

    ​​​​​​​the shadows on her
    breasts
    crescent moons

  • #2
    I'm still trying to properly learn haiku, let alone senryu, but find these wonderful! (I'd not heard of the 1 lined senryu - thanks for passing that on also).

    Comment


    • amenOra
      amenOra commented
      Editing a comment
      No problemo -- there are things I've learned, also, like not using a verb, to construct one of these poems. Always a pleasure, RhymeLovingWriter!

  • #3
    These are great. MHENRY would like them.

    Comment


    • RhymeLovingWriter
      RhymeLovingWriter commented
      Editing a comment
      I was thinking the same thing when I read them LG. Are you still around somewhere MHenry?

    • amenOra
      amenOra commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks guys Appreciate it! Be well

  • #4
    I like these, amenOra. I think you should definitely keep working with the form.

    Comment


    • amenOra
      amenOra commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks, good advice - I will! I tried my hand at many "tanka" a few years ago, and that is one challenging form, for whatever reason. But one I found so beautiful when it did "connect"! Take care

  • #5
    Nicely done amenOra. I especially liked the last one.

    Comment


    • amenOra
      amenOra commented
      Editing a comment
      I am really glad you mentioned that, thanks, I have a thing for that one too. lol...
      Thank you for stopping by!

  • #6
    his last words
    "may God strike
    me dead."

    not a wish
    but "if"
    ungasped

    Comment


    • #7
      sad songs
      too many of them
      alone
      This has a nice
      feel

      Comment


      • amenOra
        amenOra commented
        Editing a comment
        Thanks for taking a liking, Johntee, I appreciate the comments!
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