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  • The side mirror

    the rain following
    Friday on the side
    mirror - flock of sky
    riding a time - trails
    late in the spirit
    rush as tears for all
    we let our hunger
    strip to the seedbeds

    all we get is gems
    flensing what’s behind

    alarum sweetens
    the mating tails waved
    the blue wrens twitching
    out the dark by day

    so late we shudder

    bless the coral throat
    blown of its evening
    the wingtips alight
    like scattered favours

    beggar the gushing
    world - the wishful well -

    soon as the hammer
    face of god westers
    flattens to weather
    our loves and the mouths
    he made extol him
    under fire again
    so late our weapons
    break to the raindrops
    Last edited by grant hayes; 08-06-2018, 05:27 PM.

  • #2
    Nice to see you here again - miss my namesake so to speak.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi Mr Grant, from one Grant to another, I salute. I welcome your re-welcome; thank you!

  • #3
    Strong. I like this, very expressive, there's a lot to this. ... it's nice to reread this one; it's the weather and the world, the singing of birds. Not too out of the ordinary except how you decided to look at it. With your particular way with words that sees far. Seems like a nice look in the rearview into the depths, the guts of the day, which turns out pretty beautiful and moody, to sit and experience the poetry of the moment.
    Yes, nice to see ya around again, thanks for sharing! Peace!

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      I do try to tap into a sense of the fleeting moment, the ordinary that I know, and to find the magnitudes in it. Thank you for the re-welcome, amenOra.

  • #4
    the message on the mirror
    things may be closer
    than they appear
    we only dream
    of flight's freedom.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Closer than they appear, indeed, Johntee. I haven't had a dream of flying for a long time; it's mainly searching or fleeing inside labyrinthine buildings.

  • #5
    Coming back with a bang then, are you? I didn't realize how much I missed your poetry until I read this today. Having so much rain in my life recently (literal and figurative) and getting involved up-close with nature on the farm, it breathes an aching beauty to my soul. If anything, your abilities, keened by life, have sharpened to exquisite finery.

    'all we get is gems...' Ah, but gems...are everything.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Glad to have spoken into your rainy days, Rhymist. ☺

      In this one, I employed the absence of punctuation alongside a strict syllabic count (five per line) and a chiastic line-count 8-2-4-1-4-2-8 in the seven stanzas. There are 29 lines in all, with the middle one 'so late we shudder' on its own. It occupies the same position the full moon does in a month of days. So the moon - and its marking of time - is present, though cryptically. The poem - from new to old moon - starts and ends with rain, and has 'late' in first and last stanzas, as well as the middle. None of this needs to be known for the poem to 'work' for a reader; it's just the kind of structure that helps me build something. I don't devise the structure first, then find words to fit; rather, words emerge, suggest a structure, and then the application of that structure draws out more words to complete it and refine it.

  • #6
    I'm truly happy to see you back here again. Me - I am still swinging in the majors with a minor league bat. But I'm still here.

    Comment


    • RhymeLovingWriter
      RhymeLovingWriter commented
      Editing a comment
      And I'm happy to say that we are all better for it! Kudos to you too Bob!

    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      You're a kind gentleman indeed, Bob. I'm glad you're still here and still swinging. You must have posted a whole book's worth of rhymes by now. You should collate them all; it would be The World According to Bob, a true omnibus of wry rhyming insight.

  • #7
    Thanks - but I have no Delusions of Grandeur. Scratching the door at 73 now - the rhyming brain cells may be decreasing? Mine has been quantity not necessarily quality - yours, on the other hand, are the exact opposite. Although, I must admit that I don't understand a lot of them. Just an honor to be on the same site as you.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Keep rhyming, Bob; your brain cells are in fine fettle. You are very generous in your compliments, and I am humbled thereby.

  • #8
    Grant I’ve been busy lately but I’ve waited to see you post again and what a post. You’ve been sorely missed. Great post and I could feel myself in the moment in this poem. Thank you.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi Alexandra. I'm so glad to see you drop by. I don't write much without the Zone, so if I want to write more, I need to be here. I wasn't all that sure this poem was post-able, so I'm pleased it spoke to you. Bless you.

  • #9
    What a beautiful poem, and insight! The moon sought you out and the reader can feel it! This was worth the wait 😂

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi lunar glide; as the moon's chief apostle here, your words about the moon's seeking mean much. You are very kind.
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