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  • RhymeLovingWriter
    replied
    "my mind is
    too laterally literal."

    Now THAT's a mouthful! And turn about is fair do - it happens with flair in the zone!

    Leave a comment:


  • Johntee
    commented on 's reply
    I'm pleased you took it up
    and I'd have been happy
    to have found
    your stripped
    down version
    but my mind is
    too laterally literal.
    In fact it was
    just a muse
    on Tanner's "handle"
    and his poetry.
    You'll see I've abused
    your words in "Dicing from Scratch"
    so turn and turn about is fair do's.
    Last edited by Johntee; 07-21-2018, 06:05 AM.

  • RhymeLovingWriter
    replied
    Absolutely lovely JT - I like the pictures it paints and the feelings it evokes.

    Though (in rather unusual turn for me), I wanted the rhythm to better fit my 'reality' of the physical substance. Sometimes I'm drawn toward the extreme of too may words, but for this my ear craved a crisper sound, toward sparsity, so, begging forgiveness in advance, I copied and pasted and removed some of the articles. How does this sound to your ear?

    To take that part

    that can't be ate,

    rendered subtle,

    repurposed, resilient

    for the hard-worn sole,

    shoe that goes the extra mile,

    and, Samaritan's role,

    soft calf for billfold's heart.


    Again, please forgive my monkeying around with your wonderful words. It must be my mood today, and I'll refrain post-haste and even remove my 'two cents' if you prefer.

    Leave a comment:


  • Johntee
    started a topic Hide Bound ?

    Hide Bound ?

    Hide Bound ?


    The Tanner's Art?

    To take that part

    that can't be ate

    yet, rendered subtle,

    can repurpose it,

    resilient for the hard-worn sole,

    the shoe that goes the extra mile,

    and, the Samaritan's role,

    soft calf for the billfold's heart.
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