Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

I'm Alright

Collapse
X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • #1

    I'm Alright

    I'm breaking down
    I'm broken now
    Not feeling so alive
    I'm still breathing
    But a part of me has died
    Will someone please tell me
    What it is I mean
    When I say that I'm alright
    My hearts beating
    But I'm bleeding deep inside

    With the face I wear
    You'll be unaware
    That it's such a thin disguise
    I'm not dying
    I'm just trying to get by
    But what lies beneath
    Are these lies I keep
    To pretend that I'm just fine
    Am I so naive
    Even I believe that lie

    'Cause I know too well
    That I need some help
    God knows how hard I've tried
    Cause I've gone alone
    When I was my only guide
    And if I could have healed
    Every hurt I feel
    Then I would have a million times
    Who is there to care
    Now enough to spare a life

    Even the deepest scars
    Of a broken heart
    Can heal again with time
    In reality
    Every darkness flees from light
    Don't let me say no to you
    Til we know the truth
    That will get me through this night
    Who can walk with me
    So I know it will be alright
    Tags: None
    • Likes 1
  • #2
    Hi BiocideJ a deeply emotional piece. Are you doing OK? This is so well-written and as I have not been on here in awhile I have not kept up with how everyone has been. I can relate to the 'thin disguise' - an original way to put it instead of 'the mask' that I so often I hear in writing... and have worn.... disguise is soooo much better. Let me know if this is autobiographical? I know that we sometimes write from another's perspective. Suz

    Comment

    • #3
      Not necessarily autobiographical. Wrote this a while back after my cousin had committed suicide.
      • Likes 1

      Comment

      • Suz-zen
        #3.1
        Suz-zen commented
        06-27-2018, 01:51 PM
        Editing a comment
        Hi! I too have experienced a family member's attempt at suicide and a few friends that unfortunately have succeeded. It is a devastation like no other to family and friends.
    • #4
      I thought this was good, but felt that the second stanza could have used less of the phrases, which were trite, such as "what lies beneath" and etc, which are so common they lose meaning that "fresh" phrasing could muster. Just thoughts, I enjoyed the piece and thought the sentiment was sincere, and beautiful because of that. Peace

      Comment

      Previous template Next
      Working...
      X