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  • There was an old lady who lived in a tree

    There was an old lady

    who lived in a tree

    which was deep the forest

    where no one should be

     

    The woman ----- was really old

    She was two hundred and three

    And her eyes were so cloudy

    she could no longer see

     

    But she could 'see' with her ears

    And she could 'see' with her nose

    And she could hear a tiny mouse

    crawling on it's tiptoes

     

    The tree was just like a house

    I mean ----- it had windows and rooms

    And in the front ----- there was a garden

    of poison mushrooms

     

    But the tree was so pretty

    It had a red wooden door

    And inside it looked like

    a weird candy store

     

    Children lost in the forest

    Found sweet treats they could lick

    But soon they found out

    it was all just a trick

     

    Once they tasted the candy

    the old witch would appear

    She laughed and she laughed

    And her intentions were clear

     

    The old woman ate little children

    But first ----- she made them all cry

    Then she chopped them all up

    and made them into pie

     

    She wore a necklace of bones

    made from the children she ate

    She also had a strange cat

    which she fed from her plate

     

    After eating little children

    she cleaned her plate with her tongue

    And I watched the old woman

    become pretty and young

     

    Her wierd transformation

    occurs pretty fast

    But three days is only

    how long it will last

     

    Hanging in the fireplace

    was a large black pot

    And beneath it a fire

    which made it get hot

     

    Up two flights of stairs

    was the old witch's room

    And in a dark corner

    was a large witch's broom

     

    The witch calls it by name

    which makes it take flight

    Then she flies out a window

    and into the night

     

    Well, one night in that tree

    my whole future was shaped

    And I am the only child

    who has ever escaped

     

    No one believes my strange story

    Most people think it's a lie

    Still they go deep in the forest

    I don't understand why

     

    But if you're lost in the forest

    and see poison mushrooms

    And then a large pretty tree

    with lots of windows and rooms

    You should turn back at once

    if you don't want to die

    Or get chopped into pieces

    and baked into pie!

  • #2

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    Comment


    • #3
      Rhymeboy - Great witch's brew of a story, well written with rhyme that holds the reader. Next time I see a tree in the forest with a red door and windows, I am OUTTA THERE, even if I'm not a kid or one of them is with me or I hear someone licking on a food plate! Yikes! Thanks for the poetic warning Rhymeboy. Namyh
      Last edited by Namyh; 09-12-2018, 05:43 PM.

      Comment


    • #4
      You've got the tone of the folktale narrative just right, Rhymeboy. The only problem: I was so involved with your story, I wanted to find out how you escaped. I mean, normally one doesn't want a poem to be overly lengthy, but in this case, you've set up a tension to be resolved, so it seems kind of incomplete or prematurely tidied away, as it stands.

      Comment


      • Rhymeboy
        Rhymeboy commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you grant hayes! The narrator escapes merely because the witch did not detect him Luckily, she was so preoccupied with leaving and she left the tree before she could detect him

      • Rhymeboy
        Rhymeboy commented
        Editing a comment
        Lol! I also have a poem called: "There Was A Young Girl Who lived in a Shoe" https://forum.rhymezone.com/forum/ma...ived-in-a-shoe
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