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Into the wind

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  • Into the wind

    This poem is for my good friend and her cousin who has been fighting cancer for several years but now there is nothing more they can do and she has decided to go into hospice.

    Into the wind


    Frivolity gone, days of ease hoped for
    Humbly resigned and dignity displays
    As chaff, into the wind her spirit soars
    Pummeled by life's trials then swept away


    Her slow dance with death fragmented my heart
    Wonderstruck by her beauty, strength and grace
    Preparing me for the day she'd depart
    This inescapable outcome embrace


    As I sob unapologetically
    Each tear cried is wiped away with her smile
    Like a gentle stream, her eyes comfort me
    Desperately clinging-living in denial


    Wishing she had more time to spend with me
    She whispered, see you in eternity
    Last edited by AlexandratheLate; 05-30-2017, 05:49 PM.

  • #2
    Heart wrenching! Wow. So sad. Good job on this one. So sad.

    Comment


    • AlexandratheLate
      AlexandratheLate commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you very much amenOra. I appreciate your reading and commenting.

  • #3
    Great Poem Sorry to hear that . It has to be the worst disease around

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    • AlexandratheLate
      AlexandratheLate commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you very much TonySP. I really appreciate your thoughts and comments. Thank you for your kindness.

  • #4
    Thank you for the like Mutaddo.

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    • #5
      Read aloud, this comes into its own, particularly in the first stanza, where the enjambment between lines 2 and 3 imparts an august, noble tone. However, at 'inevitability' I stumbled, and with 'unapologetically' hard on its heels fell face-down in a hypersyllabic heap. Go easy on those ornate abstractions and vast adverbs!

      Comment


      • AlexandratheLate
        AlexandratheLate commented
        Editing a comment
        I changed the last line in the second stanza, which I think is smoother now but I'm still trying to see how I can change the other one. As for the abstractions, I was trying to convey her vast emotions, e.g., anger, fear, frustration, acceptance, helplessness while her dying cousin is comforting her and already resigned. Thank you for your input Grant. I appreciate it.
        Last edited by AlexandratheLate; 05-30-2017, 06:10 PM.

    • #6
      Powerful stuff - this dance of life and death. This is a wonderful tribute to your friend. May it help to bring you a sense of peace also. Hugs from the zone.

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      • #7
        Thank you very much Paula. I sincerely appreciate your comments.

        Comment


        • #8
          Hello AlexandratheLate, This just aches with sadness. Such a sorrowful wait - the sorrow of waiting for sorrow in hauntingly imposing poetry. May your time left together be sweet and loving. Regards, Tony.

          Comment


          • AlexandratheLate
            AlexandratheLate commented
            Editing a comment
            Thank you very much Tony. I really appreciate all the hugs and love from the Zone.

        • #9
          you've depicted the wide range of emotions with grace. it's all you can do. i'm sorry for their suffering.

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        • #10
          Very sad Alexandra, so sorry. Your words so heartfelt and pure.

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          • #11
            Thank you very much Bobby.

            Comment


            • #12
              Powerful, sorrowful, emotional.

              Comment


              • #13
                Thank you very much Dwayne.

                Comment


                • #14
                  Thank you very much for the like AnatoliyS.

                  Comment


                  • #15
                    My thoughts and prayers are with you, Alexandra, and your friend. Such suffering no one should have to go through.

                    Comment


                    • AlexandratheLate
                      AlexandratheLate commented
                      Editing a comment
                      Thank you very much NY. I appreciate it.
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