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I know what you mean about similes, Suz-zen, but I have learned to love them. A well-deployed one can be most efficacious, as you demonstrate in your recent share 'rusted gate'.
'The blushed innards' - now there's a phrase to conjure with! You'd better use it yourself, Tony, or I may steal it
Many thanks for your compliments and for sharing your thoughts on the companionable potential of poems - you know that whereof you speak, I trow.
LOVE! grant hayes
Similes have always been abrasive to me for some reason. ( I use them, but prefer not to!) Here you have broken that spell and cast a net, no 'veil of shame' over my former feel!! Wonderful!! You took me to an AHA!
Hello grant, I don't blame you for feeling affection for this piece. There are poems, though rare, when you let go, they refuse to leave, like a friend when needed, a wise companion, as it were. Such a friendship would only better a fellow. The final line brought the whole poem together, the blushed innards of all races exposed in the same hue the art of life. A poet could not come across a better poem. Regards, Tony.
I like it that this has a mantra-like quality to you, Rhymist. And, yes, that message you identify is conveyed in the lines, all of them interpreted by the last line. That one sets itself apart from the rhythm of the seven preceding similes, to draw attention to their commonality - they are facets of one truth. They are also a kind of descent. They are not sweet, these similes, yet I do not feel that this is a dark poem. The universality and inclusion of the last line implies a kind of hope, I think. The realisation of our common flawed humanity, as your own tradition knows so well, is the touchstone of wisdom.
Parkinsonspoet, I had been compiling a list of similes, in as__as__ style, hoping that one of them might catalyse further development into a poem; concurrently, I was trying to think of a context for the line 'we're all pink on the inside'. The raw materials were all in front of me, and a flicker of insight helped me see which pieces fitted together. So yes, this was perhaps a less 'controlled' process than is typical.
I looked up this exhibition, and it looks like something I would enjoy very much. If my poem were somehow present at a display like that, I'd feel like I had spoken aloud.
I have read and reread this, almost like a mantra, wondering (being in a state of wonder) at how you distill with your word choices. What I hear each time is that we have much more in common than we hold as differences. I like that message very much.
I like this and to me it reads very naturally which suggests perhaps a more instinctive rather than meticulous approach but I may be completely wrong. amenOra is Locanther a poet, I think I saw that name on another site. Am wondering if it was your friend
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