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  • Five


    Five

    Ten and eighteen
    Something starting here and now,
    no known direction – certainly not one.
    Perhaps one at a time?

    Ten and nineteen
    Was this to be reflective of
    some form and substance already
    known to man or woman or both?

    Ten and twenty
    My, my how quickly run the sands
    of time measured by moments,
    passed around like scones at tea.

    Ten and twenty one
    This plays absurdity full force
    to watch, wait, pitter and patter
    keyboard as stage; game, set and match.

    Ten and twenty two
    Dull and aching space – will any
    words be found at end of this
    drop-down waiting for flip of hourglass?

    Ten and twenty three
    This could go on forever – perhaps;
    not exactly for all time but long enough
    to make you want to slit your wrist in escape but
    Oh! the mess and bother of that!

    Ten and twenty four has arrived;
    and so…the end.

  • #2
    This is a fun and accomplished piece of writing, RLW, with an almost dark ending!

    Comment


    • RhymeLovingWriter
      RhymeLovingWriter commented
      Editing a comment
      Yeah - that's something new for me. I've been reading some poems on another site - really gut-wrenching stuff, and many sound like the poets are considering ending it all. I just wanted to end the poem. I was kind of surprised it came out that way, but since it was 'stream of consciousness', I just put my fingers to the keypad and typed. Must be channeling the darker side tonight.

      I did go back after the five minutes and add some punctuation though - just couldn't leave that alone too.

  • #3
    I find this charming and intriguing, Rhymist. Great concept and well wrought! Zesta!

    Comment


    • RhymeLovingWriter
      RhymeLovingWriter commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you Grant. I've never done anything like this before - on a timer. I just happened to catch the clock in the lower right hand of my keyboard*, and started typing away. I didn't even know how long I would go - but five turned out to be the 'magic moment'. I didn't even know how many minutes until I went back and counted - that's where the title came from.
      *monitor
      Last edited by RhymeLovingWriter; 11-21-2016, 10:09 PM.

    • Suz-zen
      Suz-zen commented
      Editing a comment
      Trying to catch up here on so many good poems! You have been busy!! And doing wonderful work!!

  • #4
    An old John Cash song comes to mind, but dammed if I can remember the title.

    Comment


    • Pyro
      Pyro commented
      Editing a comment
      Same here divot ; I'm not sure if it's the same song though but Johnny's '25 minutes to go' instantly came to my mind.
      Quite an intriguing write RLW, your never ending drive to try new things (and nail them) is very inspirational

    • RhymeLovingWriter
      RhymeLovingWriter commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks Pyro - I'll look that up. There's a lot of inspiration to be found right here in the zone! This one was just a fluke of the seeing the clock and having time to spare.

    • RhymeLovingWriter
      RhymeLovingWriter commented
      Editing a comment
      Wow - I just watched a You tube video of that song - glad I wasn't facing a noose while writing! Thanks for sharing that guys!

  • #5
    Thanks Bry89 for the look and like! I appreciate it!

    Comment


    • #6
      L O V E this!! the ending mostly ! and this..... Ten and twenty two
      Dull and aching space – will any
      words be found at end of this
      drop-down waiting for flip of hourglass?


      RhymeLovingWriter BRRRRRavA!!

      Comment


      • RhymeLovingWriter
        RhymeLovingWriter commented
        Editing a comment
        Thanks Suz-zen. Good to see your name pop up again. I'm glad you enjoyed this bit of my meandering mind last night! Thanks for the read and like.
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