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  • Gone Before

    Deleted
    Last edited by grant hayes; 12-25-2017, 08:11 PM.

  • #2
    Imagistic, and simply beautiful. There is too much to love here.

    A bare tree breaks a pane of light
    ​​​​​​​across the lawn, as houses crouch
    in the lee of internment

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you, Tanner. It pleases me that you have found those lines affecting; I wanted to find a home for this image when it first appeared to me.

  • #3
    this is uncompressed enough that it is at a high point of beauty . as much as I admire the lyric I'm equally impressed by the restraint and the craft!

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Yes, it is much less congested than my usual fare, lunar glide. That you find it beautiful is a joy to me.

  • #4
    And so the words, the soothing gloss of glottal stop, reworked, reborn - assuages arid hearts adrift these many weeks away. Breathtaking beauty on display Master Hayes! Thank you.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      And thank you for the poetic lilt of your comment, Rhymist! You are most welcome.

  • #5
    Removed in time for polish, pounded iron to steel. Clad in gold the silver straps, lift us all that kneel. Great work Grant.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Your versified comment is beautifully wrought, divot; thank you!

  • #6
    Hello Grant, From life's labour to the patient clay - the clay waits for all of us. 'Tis harsh the helve you grasp as you plow the 'acre', 'as long as hate' in this powerfully raw swat of remarkable poetry, composed at the 'world's extreme', beyond the extreme of many a poet in the complex beauty of your writing, the uniqueness of your storytelling and the deftness of your poetical acumen. The depth of your expression is captivating, relentless in exemplifying the noble like beauty of your style and the bare boned honesty of a great writer. Excellent! Regards, Tony.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      'raw swat' - I love that! You should find a home for that phrase in a poem of yours, Tony, or I may steal it
      Thank you for engaging and for such a lovely compliment.

  • #7
    You have created another masterpiece, Grant Sensei! There is so much talent, measure, craft and poesy on display here in this dreamy nostalgic piece. This deserves many reads and likes and gilded pages on which to rest.

    Comment


    • grant hayes
      grant hayes commented
      Editing a comment
      Good to see you back, Maestro. You know, I had sort of forgotten this piece, as I had neglected to copy it into my 'collected' file. When I rediscovered it, it seemed to read better than before. Sometimes it takes distance like that to get a clearer perspective on one's work. There are definitely other pieces I've thought were good at the time of completion, that I now find cringeworthy.

    • MHenry
      MHenry commented
      Editing a comment
      I know the feeling! Sometimes, as I go back to re-read some of my work, I click in and click immediately out, squeezing a cringe in there for good measure!

    • lunar glide
      lunar glide commented
      Editing a comment
      me too with mine! cringe.
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