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It's a Metaphor!

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  • It's a Metaphor!

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    Last edited by Bison; 12-10-2016, 07:03 PM.

  • #2
    This is VERY clever Bison. I really stink at chess, but I'd say you're going for check-MATE!

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    • #3
      Thank you for sharing, Bison!

      I really like the last two stanzas:

      Oh, if this is the lay, I don't want to play,
      I'm sick of your games, they lead me astray
      I've had too much to drink, I just need to think,
      you might not flinch, but I bet you blink

      Don't you see this isn't a game to me?
      This is my life, my hopeless design
      For love, for love,
      What was I thinking of?
      I must admit, my very inexperienced ear is not used to the free-form long lines of the first two stanzas (I cannot understand Whitman at all, though I never cease to try). This is in NO WAY reflection of your skill, but of my limited perspective (I have never read poetry before this August). Poems like this get me out of my comfort zone and force me to ever learn. Thank you for this!

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      • #4
        Wow, hey, thank you both! This was a fun piece to write.

        RLW, I lol'd at the pun!

        Ana, I too struggle with Whitman. The long free form is actually just (to me) a by-product of my inability to parse and pace my words. But on the other hand, poetry, while possessing definite forms and styles, can arise in any sort of configuration.

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        • RhymeLovingWriter
          RhymeLovingWriter commented
          Editing a comment
          I agree Bison - about the form. Though I learned in strict meter - I'm enjoying trying new horizons with free form. So many creative ways to share what's inside of us in this art of poetry!
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