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Unchanged and Pure

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  • Unchanged and Pure

    Unchanged and Pure

    A Brother stands in front of me,
    In light, in perfect holiness I see
    Him standing still, secure –
    Unchanged and pure.

    My love extending towards him,
    God’s Love, not ego’s fleeting whim,
    Of one thing I am sure –
    It is unchanged and pure.

    The lies you hear,
    So intricately ringing in your ear,
    They’re difficult, they change,
    For they’re designed to derange.

    The Truth is simple, it’s your cure,
    The Truth you’re destined to reclaim –
    Forever same,
    Unchanged and pure.

  • #2
    Very nice AnatoliyS. I read it and thought immediately, and the Truth shall set you free! Your pattern of AABB rhyme in the first three stanzas changed to ABBA for the last (interesting all by itself that the designation of the rhyme scheme actually spells a name of God). Was that intentional?

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    • #3
      Thank you for your comment RLW! I cannot say the change of structure was intentional - I never plan to structure a poem this or that way. However, when it came up that way I thought it closes the poem very nicely - the change of structure kind of puts a period in the end. AABB is a pretty balanced structure, and when the last couplet is missing the expected rhyme in the third line, it creates a kind of suspension, immediately resolved in the next line. I did not plan it that way, it is just happened to flow like that.

      It was one of the first 5 or 10 poems I've written, so I did not know much about structure or rhythm.

      P.S. By the way, I am "Nthint", I asked the admin to change my nickname to reflect my real name, instead of using a meaningless set of letters.
      Last edited by AnatoliyS; 11-02-2016, 07:30 AM.

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      • RhymeLovingWriter
        RhymeLovingWriter commented
        Editing a comment
        Well, intentional or not - it worked very well!

        Yes, I'd figured that part out (about the name). Do you have a preference for how you're addressed in comments in the future?

      • AnatoliyS
        AnatoliyS commented
        Editing a comment
        My first name is Anatoliy, that should work. Thank you for your comments once again!

    • #4
      The Truth you’re destined to reclaim –
      Forever same,
      Unchanged and pure.

      Yes!!!

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      • #5
        This is poetry if the first rate, as are all of your poems that I have had the pleasure of reading.

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        • #6
          Suz-zen - thank you! This is actually the only poem that I memorized by heart. I use it as a simple meditation to avoid judging fellow brothers/sisters/human beings. Whenever I feel that my attitude towards someone is ego-driven (ego is synonymous with devil to me - I am just not religious so the word makes more sense to me personally), I quietly recite this poem to myself, and feel that this someone IS me - we are one. Judging him/her, I am judging myself. On the other hand, the love is received through giving it away.

          Dwayne - thank you for your kind comment! I still have a lot to learn, and I feel like this forum will help me a lot. Thank you for reading - the pleasure is mine.

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