empty coffin

[Suz-zen]

sincere thanks DWAYNE. i have not felt much confidence of late in my writing, so your comment is really the shot in the arm i needed. Never sure if these thoughts and feelings i have connect... really appreciate it the read and taking the time to comment... your writing has such power to do both consistently.

[DWAYNE]

This was really foreboding.

You really have a talent for conveying both sentiment and sensation!

[Suz-zen]

thanks lg! comforting routines.... how we grow accustomed to the comforts...the ending not always expected... though it ought to be... only thing constant is change. Heraclitas tried to teach us that.
Why are we surprised when it does? This is a universal truth.

[lunar glide]

much to ponder suz-zen. smart transition from comforting routines to the inevitable.

[Suz-zen]

Thank you Tanner ... I was going fro a merging coffin/hourglass ... death time run out... and yes out of body experience....frightening to say the least....an experience was by surprise...jolting from my life a few nights ago... real life... or as I tried to convey... seemed unreal... a dream, but it wasn't. some things so difficult to fathom go to 'that place' maybe....
I appreciate your your comments! Again, thanks.

[Suz-zen]

Hi MH. I looked up the lyrics and him as artist... I can see where you were going with this... thanks for the new name/and I will read more....

[MHenry]

He was a country-western singer who did of an overdose. He had a signature style. Some of his songs are hauntingly beautiful.

[Tanner]

Suz-zen, Yikes! Love the visual layout. Reminds me somewhat of an Egyptian mummy or statue. Brilliant use of the short lines. This reminds me of a scary out of body depersonalization experience I had in my late teen years. Your dismissal of creature comforts in such brevity and punch, took the breath out of me!

[Suz-zen]

Thank you MHenry i am not familiar with Townes Van Zandt 'Waitin' 'round to Die but will look it up...

[Suz-zen]

RhymeLovingWriter thank you for reading and commenting. Not a dream... or was it a dream? I still wonder....

[Suz-zen]

thank you AlexandratheLate. sad and eerie was the feel when I felt compelled to wrote. Could not sleep until I got this 'out of me....'
An attempt of exorcism.

[MHenry]

Love this, Suz-zen! Reminiscent of Townes Van Zandt 'Waitin' 'round to Die.'

[RhymeLovingWriter]

Several ethereal pieces posted today - speaking to the illusory passing or being of mankind. This piece is gripping Suz-zen - and I wonder - was its impetus in fact a dream?

[AlexandratheLate]

Kind of a sad eery feeling Suz-zen. Nicely done!!

[Suz-zen]

Peering up
into a lighted room
from a darkened street
nothingness fills space

a view
into an empty coffin
missing its solitary corpse


books that lined the shelves
provided short-lived comfort
easy chair
clothing
music
all
gone
sanitized walls remain

as my hands shake
eye lids close

will answers come?
was it all a dream?