Lurking Strangers

[MHenry]

Lurking Strangers

Those lurking strangers
Whispering - furtive glances
They know I see them
I cross the street to feel safe
Still, sweat beads on my forehead

Now, they head my way
Running faster toward me
I start to panic
I speed up - should I run, too?
Nah! We miss the bus, so what!

[Parkinsonspoet]

MHenry I love this apart from the end line and am not sure what to say This is just my personal reaction- All the lines are from the mind of a paranoid person the arrator but the last line from the other people for me it would flow better if the last line was a realisation from the narrators point of view.

[MHenry]

Thanks for for sharing your concern, Pp.

The last line is actually from the paranoid person, and is intended to reveal that she is worried about missing the bus, not about the other two lurking strangers, who are also running for the bus stop.

[Parkinsonspoet]

Mhenry thank you that makes a lot of sense I can see that now but it is the word we that took me down the wrong track

[MHenry]

I reconsidered my choice after you, Pp, and RLW suggested the problem, but once we all look at the last line from the point of view of the narrator, I think all is well with 'we.' Thank you both for pointing this out!

[AlexandratheLate]

Love your ending!! It was tense and then release. Great one MH.

[Darthvader]

I agree, I love the twist

[MHenry]

Thanks, Darth!

[Muttado1sb]

I quite enjoyed this, especially your twist at the end!

[MHenry]

Thanks, Muttado! It's all about the twist! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[DWAYNE]

I love the way you weave mystery into poetic cloth!

Fun!

[MHenry]

Thank you, Dwayne. I was again influenced by a grant hayes' poem, this time, the party!

[lunar glide]

fun to read and well done!

[MHenry]

Thanks for the read and comment, lg!

[grant hayes]

Textbook turn of the Henry kind. Missing the bus is never a 'so what for me'. I curse for eons in an instant.

[MHenry]

Thank you, grant, Sensei. It is true, missing the bus is a foul occurrence. Yet, if one can adopt an attitude of zen-like acceptance, it would be better. Or, you could borrow from the child in the Matrix. 'There is no bus.'