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  • Say You Love Me

    Say you love me,
    With those eyes so starry-
    Nightly,
    Before this moment leaves so fast-
    I'll be your marionette,
    And as we swing our spinning steps,
    We'll forget all the memories through whiskey and cheap cigarettes-

    Oh, say you love me,
    Im so tired of fighting,
    Don't say you hate me,
    I'm sick of crying on the floor-
    Please don't lift a opened hand,
    We can just dance, drown down our favorite Brandy Brand,
    Knives, scars and tears sparkling-
    Say you love me.

    Say you love me,
    Hold my hand in the middle of this ghost town of a house-
    Save me,
    From all the drugs, alcohol, abusers and liars-
    Drink, Drink,
    Drink til God says we're bad,
    Smoke, Smoke,
    Until we forget that we're sad-

    Oh, say you love me,
    Im so tired of fighting,
    Don't say you hate me,
    I'm sick of crying on the floor-
    Please don't lift a opened hand,
    We can just dance, drown down our favorite Brandy Brand,
    Knives, scars and tears sparkling-
    Say you love me.
    Last edited by One Wingless Angel; 07-09-2016, 08:10 AM.

  • #2
    starry nightly eyes! yes 😄

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    • #3
      With repeated refrain - this resembles lyrics - have you perhaps set it to music too?

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      • #4
        Good call, RLW, This does sound like a song, but a rough one! I like what you've done here, OWA, with the desperation drowned in drink and drugs and the more painful moments of lucid desperation!

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        • #5
          I was thinking about setting this to music and writing songs like this, but its a work in progress being that my guitar broke recently. Thanks for the feedback! 💕

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          • #6
            There is something in the demand of the way you worded this 'Say you love me' - as if option doesn't exist in desperation. Then, the addition of 'Oh' to begin stanzas 2 and 4 softens the demand into pleading. Interesting back and forth OWA.

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            • #7
              I like this one a lot One Wingless Angel like my cohorts here i also heard this as lyrics... a lamentation...the Whiskey brandy ciggs open hand crying on the floor. what a picture you have painted. I was right there with the couple... hoping they would dance knowing that they could not. the final plea of say you love me broke my heart.

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              • #8
                This is one of your very best, in my opinion, One Wingless Angel. The way it flows, the powerful contrasts, the imagery, all add up to a convincing portrayal of one side in a desperate codependency. I particularly like 'Drink till God says we're bad' - wow, great line.

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                • #9
                  Thank you all for the feedback~ I really appreciate it. I'll be posting some more soon. 💕

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                  • #10
                    I agree with grant hayes, Wingless. This one was flawless! I've been so amazed by nearly everything you've wrote- and I sometimes find myself endlessly searching through the forums trying to find more of your poetry. Write more soon!

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