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  • Muttado1sb
    commented on 's reply
    Well it still worked that way for me. :-)

  • MHenry
    commented on 's reply
    My PM box was full, so I probably didn't get it for that reason.

  • Muttado1sb
    commented on 's reply
    I thought I had replied, MH. I'll check after I get home.

  • RhymeLovingWriter
    replied
    Really enjoying this entire thread - and process. You ALL rock!

    Leave a comment:


  • MHenry
    commented on 's reply
    Muttado1sb, I sent you a private message, but I don't think you got it. Did you?

  • Muttado1sb
    commented on 's reply
    Thank you, grant. I wish I could say I try, but this isn't trying for me.

  • grant hayes
    replied
    Top work, Muttado, MHenry, and Sumyanna.

    Leave a comment:


  • Sumyanna
    commented on 's reply
    Thank you. I had to try - it looked like fun.

  • Sumyanna
    commented on 's reply
    I did not set out to do that one yet :-) This was just an attempt at the four syllables. I am still pondering that one - perhaps in longer form than four syllables, I think. Thank you highly Muttado1sb.

  • MHenry
    replied
    I thought I posted on this, Sumyanna. These are beautiful!

    Leave a comment:


  • Muttado1sb
    commented on 's reply
    Very well done! It seems more the thoughts of each than a conversation, but the points of view are clear. I love how the scene is set in each frame, balanced in both sets, then the shift for point of view. And the contrast of the free verse with the rhyme. I enjoyed this very much.

  • Sumyanna
    replied
    And yet you said
    you loved me once
    the tears, the pain
    what have I done?
    To choose to trust
    yet still swallow
    your lies, your lies
    I've come undone.

    I loved you once
    but time does change
    time did change me
    I have grown old
    in your presence
    and love is swept
    like daylight dust
    away, away!

    And yet you said
    you loved me once
    my heart that beats
    shattered fragments
    blown to the wind
    in sorrows grip
    I lie alone
    you walk away.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    But love was lost
    and at what cost
    for though in love
    he could not shove
    his thoughts away.

    His beauty wept
    she barely slept
    the passing hours
    her love then sours
    he yearns to stray.

    He says goodbye
    though she did try
    her love is gone
    his love is drawn
    he found new prey.

    Had to try :-)
    Last edited by Sumyanna; 05-25-2016, 11:18 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • Sumyanna
    replied
    I have actually used this before (or should I say that my daughter has). She had to write a poem in response to a famous poem (The Mending Wall) and she purposefully chose to respond as the neighbor in the poem but in a completely different style to show how different their personalities are. I think that sometimes they can play off one another quite well. You both did a fabulous job!

    I wonder what it would be like to write a conversational poem between two characters where one writes in rhyme and the other does not. I wonder how you would make their personalities fit those forms. Interesting...

    Leave a comment:


  • Muttado1sb
    replied
    Hmm, seems like this form, because of its brevity, makes it easy to play off each other's poems in continuation or as counterpoint. Another point in its favor. Thanks, MH.

    Leave a comment:


  • MHenry
    replied
    Haha! Spitting 'em out like broken teeth!

    Double or naught

    Free verse works, too
    Don't have to rhyme
    Words are still few
    Just as sublime
    So, stack your chips
    And smack your lips
    Your buck, my luck!

    Leave a comment:

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