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If Stars were Souls

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  • If Stars were Souls

    Looking up at the darkening night
    You see the shimmer a tiny light
    More become visible startling bright
    Behold a glistening magical sight

    Stars shining in the open night sky
    Brightly glimmering an ocean up high
    Like waves in a sea only they fly
    A sparkle of life, gleaming and spry

    A soul is lifted into the dark night
    To watch from above as a shimmering light.
    Last edited by ; 05-05-2016, 10:12 PM.

  • #2
    She is up among the stars I am certain of that

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    • #3
      Very nice! I especially like the comparison to an ocean.

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        Thank You!

    • #4
      And I can't see,
      If there's no light,
      So whys this darkness, oh so bright?

      The cosmos bends, the light it brings,
      The words you wrote, have truth that sings.

      Well done, & technical too.
      Thanks very much for sharing.

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        Nice addition! Thanks for reading it was my pleasure posting!

    • #5
      Hi, Rach79, I think it already stands on its own. All the different lights in the dark, in the sky and in our souls. It is a beautiful, dreamy image and takes us out of ourselves for the moment. I love this! Plus, you are a Master in Training. That is awesome!

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        Thank you, the more I read I think I agree! Ha master in training, I'm still learning most of y'all are on a level I haven't reached including you! That title comes with being on Rhymezone longer that's all 😉

    • #6
      Rach79...

      Hi. I wasn't trying to make an ""addition"" to your wonderful
      Piece.

      I usually reply with a relevant rhyme, when a FANTASTIC RHYME
      like yours is shown....

      Those whom know me like ALEXANDRATHELATE will
      Vouch for that.

      Please don't think I was ADDING TO YOUR WORK.
      I'm sorry if I gave you that impression.

      It's a wonderful piece on its own...
      Cheers.
      Last edited by Billie Burd; 05-05-2016, 02:26 AM.

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        Oh I guess I didn't really mean it like that! I certainly didn't take offense. I love comeback poetry! Another friend does that too! 😀

    • #7
      Thanks. I noticed someone else replied to your piece,
      IMMEDIATELY AFTER I REPLIED, by saying?

      IT STANDS ON ITS OWN.

      So I just didn't want to give the impression that I was
      Adding to it in any way...

      Be well.
      Ciao 4 Now

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      • #8
        Master in training means you give a**** about the other poets. Wear it proud rach

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          Thank you Fellow Master in Training

      • #9
        Your welcome Rach!

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