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"Peacefully Chaotic" Short Story

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  • SpotDog04
    commented on 's reply
    Thanks for your feedback! Glad you enjoyed it

  • SpotDog04
    commented on 's reply
    Thank you! It took me quite a while to get an idea for this (it's actually an assignment for school), but once I knew what I was doing, it went along fairly smoothly.

  • Catz
    replied
    I enjoyed reading this, but felt myself pausing to try and keep track

    I would love to see this fleshed out even more, still in keeping with a short story length, but then I like how quickly I could get through it.

    I do like your style very much

    Leave a comment:


  • RhymeLovingWriter
    replied
    Intriguing write. Was it a long process writing this, keeping everyone straight? Or was it one of those pieces that seemed to 'write itself'?

    Leave a comment:


  • SpotDog04
    commented on 's reply
    Thank you! Glad you liked it!

  • avensis
    replied
    Very nice story thank you for sharing

    Leave a comment:


  • SpotDog04
    started a topic "Peacefully Chaotic" Short Story

    "Peacefully Chaotic" Short Story

    All around us, the world was falling into Chaos’s hands. She was a cruel leader; sporadic and unorganized. The people she controlled longed for Peace. Ignorance, Chaos’s accomplice, prohibited that from happening. Peace and Chaos were warring at this time, and few thought a middle ground could be established. Peaceful chaos didn’t seem to be a very reasonable arrangement. It was a severe contradiction, the people said. It’s not possible, they said.

    What they needed was Hope. Hope helped people to believe. But many ignored her efforts.

    In the dark of night, my best friend came to me to discuss what she felt. We were forbidden to do so on Isolation’s terms. But it was Inspiration who sent her to me.

    “Evelyn, how can you trust Hope? I mean, she’s always telling everyone about fantasies and illusions; none of it ever comes true. She claims that things used to be different, like, a long, long time ago, but I’ve searched all my history books, I’ve asked questions. I can’t find answers. Peace doesn’t act, either.”

    “Samantha, don’t forget what Patience has said,” I reminded her. “There’s a timetable laid out. Everything will fall into place at the due time. The Leaders surely know what we need, and they will never fail to provide it. Don’t let Doubt control your mind. He’s everywhere, and he knows people. He knows what they’re thinking, and if you seem like a receptive mind, he’ll infiltrate your very being. I’ve heard that it’s a devestati—”

    “You don’t know where I’m coming from. I’ve seen things, Evelyn. I’ve experienced things. You haven’t seen as much as me, you haven’t been around as long as me. Trust me when I say that things aren’t going to get better.”

    I gasped, shocked at how cynical she had become. My eyes widened in surprise. “You’ve already let Doubt into your mind.”

    “Yes, I have.” She was unmoved by those words, her facial expression unchanging. She seemed different, having almost a new sense of confidence in what she believed.

    “And you’re not brokenhearted? You don’t feel bound by your past beliefs?”

    “No. I’m actually quite happy,” she said, bearing the brightest smile I’ve ever seen as proof.

    I was astonished. “Doubt found you, but in doing so, you also found Contentment?”

    She nodded enthusiastically.

    A smile crept over my face, but I shortly removed it. “That was a reckless and selfish act, Samantha.” Her smile faded. “God, what am I going to do with you?”

    “Curiosity visited me, Evelyn. Please understand. It was not of my own ambitions.”

    I groaned. “Curiosity is always testing his theories on people. He doesn’t care how dangerous it will be.” I started pacing and talking mainly to myself now. “After all we’ve been through, he still wants to test limits—”

    “Evelyn.”

    “—and disregard the safety factors put into place by Peace. Stupid, stupid, stup—”

    “Evelyn…”

    “—id. God. Son of a—”

    “Evelyn!”

    “Yes, yes, I hear you! Sorry. What?”

    “Inspiration wanted me to give you a message. After all, Curiosity and she were working together.”

    “Gosh, you were just visited by everyone yesterday, weren’t you!”

    Samantha looked down and took a deep breath, possibly trying to keep her composure. “She wanted me to tell you that both sides can work together in harmony with effort. I’m proof. I have doubts, but that doesn’t stop me from being happy. It doesn’t stop me from enjoying my life. It just makes me more rational.”

    “So, what? Are you saying this could be a widespread thing?”

    She nodded.

    “Do you know how many problems that will cause? How will you be able to differentiate between the good and the bad?”

    “Evelyn, you’re still young. Soon you’ll realize that even if all was good, the bad elements are still out there. Things can’t be completely pure. It’s not possible.”

    “There’s your doubts again.”

    “Everyone has doubts. Even you, but you’re so adamant against believing it. Ignorance found you, Evelyn.”

    And, that was when I walked away. I couldn’t deal with her; I couldn’t deal with the lies she had been told—the lies that she believed. There was no way that the Leaders were turning against each other…no, that’s not what she said. There was no way the Leaders were working behind each other’s backs. Experimenting on flawless humans only to dole out flaws. It was intolerable. But right now, too many thoughts flowed through my head, clouding my rationality.

    I’m not ignorant, I told myself. There’s nothing wrong with me. I am still a perfect human; faultless, unblemished…impeccable even! Yes. I just need to—

    My thoughts vanished.

    “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.” A female quietly chuckled.

    I looked behind me, and there was Chaos. Not even 5 feet away from me.

    “Do you know him? Martin Luther King Jr.? He said that.”

    “What do you want, Chaos? Because I am not a fan of how you’ve treated my people.”

    “Woah! Woah, Evelyn. Your people?”

    Her frivolous tone made me unexpectedly angry.

    “Listen, that’s not what I meant, and you know it—”

    Chaos held up her hand. Yeah, of course she would. “No, actually, I didn’t. Irrationality makes people believe things that aren’t true. Besides, even if you were thinking reasonably,” she leaned closer with a coy smile, “I can’t read minds.” She stepped back and laughed out loud as if she’d said something terribly funny.

    I rolled my eyes. Irrationality, nothing.

    “Anyway,” a long pause. She looked around like she was lost in thought. I turned around to leave. Anything was better than to wait around for this idiot to tighten her screws. “Ah, ah! Nope. I have things to tell you.”

    I let out an exaggerated sigh and faced her again. “Yes?”

    “I’d like to work together with you and your friends!” She was now…jumping up and down with the demeanor of a young child. It was unsettling. “Guess what?” she said excitedly.

    I raised my eyebrows. “Hm?”

    She frowned. “You don’t like me.”

    “What? That’s what you wanted to tell me? Goodness, gracious. I’m leaving now.”

    “Do you like Frustration’s abilities, Evelyn?”

    I stopped in place. “No,” I said slowly, contemplating what twist she was going to throw at me now.

    “Well, you certainly use them a lot in how you deal with others.”

    Her look was scrutinizing.

    “Listen, I know you think that I and my side are ‘terrible, horrible, no good, very bad’ people. Yes, I just alluded to a children’s book. My mind is a jumble, you know. I don’t always think straight. I don’t always remember what I was talking about. Point in case. Deary, please remind me as to what I last said.”

    “You said that I don’t like you and your friends.”

    “Ah, right. That is true, isn’t it?”

    “Well, obviously.”

    “Great. Well, the truth is, we’ve all been working in harmony. Not everyone believes this. You’re evidently an opposer. Every human has good and bad qualities. You see, Peace and I aren’t friends, but we’re not enemies. We have different outlooks. At first, Ignorance hindered our judgment, making it impossible for us to see other possibilities. But Hope helped us to imagine. Doubt liked to trick our minds and make it seem like we couldn’t get to our goal. I personally, if you could believe it,” she snorted, “I liked how crazy everything was. Peace, though, she couldn’t handle it. Frustration would visit her at those times; Anger would too on occasion. That’s when Worry called Patience to talk to her.”

    “You’re lying,” I said bluntly.

    “Talk to Honesty, if you want. He’ll tell you all about it. God, it was chaotic. It was perfection. Sometimes Inspiration would give us new ideas for how to make things work and Curiosity would get started right away, experimenting. It was fascinating. Organization helped us too, just so that things wouldn’t get too unruly.”

    “Why are you telling me this?” I asked.

    “Evelyn, we need you on our side. We need you to believe. Well, everyone to believe. No one can live a satisfying life without knowing that they’re going to have bad moments and that it’s okay. Everyone matters and every voice can make a difference. The more the better. The truth needs to get out there.”

    “Compassion?”

    “I’ve got all of them in me, Evelyn. So do you. I don’t need you to make a decision right now, but I do need you to think about it. Hannah chose to side with us, and she’s happy. She tried to evaluate how receptive you would be and whether or not you would need more persuading. We want you happy too. Speak to Peace, if you’d like. She typically has good advice when it comes to mental well-being.”

    I nodded and walked away solemnly. I couldn’t give Chaos the satisfaction of letting her know she had convinced me. She definitely didn’t need any more visits from Ego. Rather, I decided I’d talk to Forgiveness. He would have good suggestions to help me transition.
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